Tuesday, February 21, 2012

And Then There Was Blog!... Blogging? Blogged?...Whatever

So the way I see it, this is The Bloggess' fault.  Honestly, it's really amazing the extent to which I've gone to avoid blogs at all.  I don't know how to twitter.  I have a Facebook account, but I only update my status about once every several months.  I don't know what Farmville looks like, and it's never even occurred to me to blog!  Well, that last part isn't exactly true.  Let's admit it.  I like to hear myself talk.  And frankly, I have LOTS to say!  It's genius really.  I mean, why in the world has it taken me this long to decide to blog?!

That said, it's still The Bloggess' fault.  I plan to write her a strongly worded letter.  It's not like I'm sitting around eating bon bons and watching Bridezilla on TV... unless I am, but that's really not my point here.  I'm busy here!!  You see, it's her fault I even started reading blogs.  Well... hers and Beyonce's.  And by Beyonce I, of course, mean the chicken and not the singer.  And if you don't know what I'm talking about, I highly recommend Googling Bloggess and Chicken.  That'll get you there.  Odds are I can add a link, but with my aforementioned avoidance of blogs in the past, it's an easy jump to conclude that I haven't figured out how to add links here yet.  Regardless, read her blog.  Then come back and read mine.  But read hers and you'll suddenly see how I got addicted and amused and fell in love with a big metal chicken which I'm still coveting.

And that brings me to Lauren!  Web Mistress of All Things Good!  Lovely title, isn't it?  I'll have to tell her about it. I'm sure she'll be thrilled.  Or maybe not as terribly upset when I tell her I've recruited her for my blogging technical needs without telling her about it in advance.  The woman's a saint!  I'm pretty sure she won't actually kill me and will likely even help!  We all need friends like that, the kind that hang their heads, listen as you babble about things that likely don't make much sense all as you get around to asking for their help with something they know a lot more than you about.  Then they just sigh and help you with it because it's easier than trying to tell you rationally why they shouldn't.  I wonder if I can clone her!

So with that very squiggly line of logic as to how I came to blogging put to rest, I'd like to introduce myself.  I'm the Queen... the Queen of All Things Good.  Frighteningly most of the people who know me would agree with this title.  Perhaps they wouldn't necessarily have thought of it for me themselves, but hearing it, I'm willing to bet that they will all know it's me!  My love of tiaras, ballet skirts, tutus, cupcakes with pink icing, and roller skates are the stuff of legend!  I love puppies and babies and small things that will fit in my handbag only to surprise me with happiness later when I find them after having forgotten about them... which happens to me on a regular basis.  (The blonde is natural, people.  Please speak slowly.)  And so now, with tiara perched soundly upon my head, I do declare myself the Queen of All Things Good.  I hereby vow to impart valuable if somewhat convoluted knowledge to my readers.  I promise to try to make some kind of sense somewhere along the way with each post, just don't expect that to be the case all the way through.  And above all, I vow to make Beyonce the chicken proud of me!  Yeah, I really do need to write to The Bloggess.

Welcome to the chaos, people!  Come on in.  The water's fine.

The Queen

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