Sunday, June 10, 2012

Jetlag, but the Blog Must Go On!

Ooooooh, jetlag!  You know there’s nothing quite like flying around the world to a time zone exactly 12 hours ahead of your own to induce a bout of jetlag.  We left at 3:20 pm on Friday afternoon on the first leg of our trip and arrived at 11:40 pm on Saturday evening, local time in Beijing.  Sounds just awful, doesn’t it?  Actually, it really wasn’t.  The longest flight was about 12 hours long, but this time differential makes it look a lot longer.  That said, I definitely feel like someone swabbed out my mouth with a cotton ball and then left a dehumidifier running inside it while I caught a few more hours of sleep in my hotel after arrival.  It’s about 5:20 am, I’m wide awake, and I can’t open my mouth because it’s so dry, it’s glued shut!  Aaaaah, the joys of airplane travel.

So I had prepared myself for a really horrible flight in general.  Everyone just kept telling me how long the flight was and how awful it was going to be and so finally…. I believed them!  Looking back on it, it just really wasn’t that bad.  I slept for a good portion of the actual flight to Beijing from Detroit… and yes, that’s what I said,  Detroit to Beijing, non-stop.  That just seemed like a weird connection to me, but WHATEVER!  I did, however, find a few things odd.  I know.  No one is shocked by oddness surrounding anything I do, but I’ll tell you about them anyway.

First of all, apparently Marvel comics created the sign for how to use the emergency exit on Delta flights.  I noticed it as I was sitting in the exit row on the first leg of our trip.

I could be wrong, but I’m pretty sure that’s an illustration of David Banner, mad as hell, ripping the door off the airplane then hurling it out.  Obviously they disguised this fact by replacing the image of The Hulk with one of this mild mannered guy doing the same activity.  I have no clue why that might be, but there we have it.  And I have the picture to prove it!

On the flight to Beijing itself, however, my little video screen in the seat in front of me decided to malfunction and repeatedly cut itself off… as I was happily playing Bejeweled 2, I might add.  It was really frustrating to me… and likely the guy in the seat in front of me since I kept beating on the screen to try to make it work again.  It’s percussion therapy, people!  It works!... sometimes… but not this time… so I ended up playing on MPH’s screen… while he was trying to watch a movie.  Yeah, sometimes it really does suck to be MPH.  On the bright side, I got a personal high score on Bejeweled 2!!  So really, it all evens out.

We did arrive in Beijing on time and just fine, though.  It wasn’t a bad trip.  We were picked up by our tour guide, delivered safely to our hotel, where we promptly tossed all of our things and settled down for a few more hours of sleep before starting again bright and early.  And that is when MPH got to experience one more of the joys of travelling with me.  I start to babble when I’m really tired.  It’s really his fault for bringing up the fact that you can get from one side of the world to the other all in about a 12 hour flight… and then making pithy remarks.

MPH:  It’s a small world, but I wouldn’t want to paint it.
Queen:  Or carpet it.
Queen: Or tile it either.
Queen:  Really, I think tiling it would be worse.
MPH:  Because you’d have to carry the tile?
Queen: No, I’m thinking of all the tile you’d have to piece together.
Queen:  It’d be even worse if you tried to do a mosaic… with like a picture and everything… just think of it.  It could be a world sized picture of me… in a garden… with my tiara… and some sheep… and stuff.
MPH:  You should probably not think of it and just go to sleep instead.  I’m just saying.

And sometimes MPH is actually right.  Regardless, it’s now 5:20 in the morning on our first morning in China.  I couldn’t sleep any longer to I got up to check email and write a bit.  I left the lights off so MPH could rest longer.  So as I sit here in the light of the computer screen, just typing happily away, we then proceed to have this conversation.

MPH (from the darkness behind me and sounding a little incredulous):  Are you wearing a hat?!
Queen (turning with her big floppy black sun hat on her head to stare at him):  No.  Why would you ask something so strange?
MPH:  Because we’re in China.  We’re jetlagged.  You’ve just gotten up out of bed.  It’s still dark. And you’re sitting at a desk, typing in our room while…. Wearing a HAT!
Queen (shrugging):  It’s so I won’t get a sunburn.  You don’t like my hat.  You WANT me to get a sunburn so my nose peels and I look like a molting albatross or something, don’t you?  It’s all a plot!
MPH (sighing):  Yes, that’s it.  Molting albatross.  That was my thought exactly.  Welcome to China.

And on that note, dear readers and loyal subjects, it’s going to be a looooooooong week in China.  Whoopee!!!!

Spreading the Random, One Post at a Time

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