Monday, August 20, 2012

Add It To The List

I don't know about the rest of you, but the Queen is (admittedly) a WEE bit scatterbrained.  And I mean wee in the largest possible way.  That whole ADHD thing I joke about... yeah, it can get pretty ugly.  My little mind goes wandering sometimes and even I'm surprised at the places it ends up... and the things that it picks up... I am a veritable font of useless information!  Here!  Let me tell you about some of it!... oh wait,  hold on. I'm on task. I swear I am.  Anyway, my point is that the way I try to compensate for this minor character quirk is to make lists.  I make lists of just about anything I can think of.  I surround myself with people who are more organized that I am and even THEY make lists for me!  But my point here is that I have a lot of lists of a lot of different things.  For instance, I have lists of:

Things my kids want for birthdays/Christmas
Things MPH (My Poor Husband) wants for birthdays/Christmas and those fantasy things he wants that he's just never going to get, but to make him happy, they're on the list
All of the 50 billion passwords I'm responsible for (now if I could just figure out what they go to...)
Things I need to do today at work
Things I need to do today at home
Things I was supposed to do last week but forgot because I lost the list in the rest of the mess on my desk
Places that I sometimes hide lists
Books I want to read

You know... the usual.  My newest addition doesn't fall under any of those lists, though.  It's another.  I should probably set the stage.

I've been trying out some of those really cool things that I've seen in the DIY section of Pinterest.  Last night I made a bottle of fairy dust!  Check it out!

Isn't it wonderful?!   Okay, it's a bottle of silver glitter, but it'll be fun at Halloween, and it still needs a "Fairy Dust" label so no one will think it's something like... a bottle of silver glitter.

Anyway, it was while I was making this that I learned a valuable lesson. In fact, it's a lesson SO valuable that I added it to my list, and I think you should add it to yours as well.  So here's my list with it's add on for today:

Things NOT to do naked:
Anything involving GLITTER!

I have to say this now.  Just... Holy Canolli, People!  Wow!  You think it's just a little glitter.  How big a deal can it be?  Well, let me just be the one to tell you.  If you're naked.... it can be a BIG deal!  Turns out glitter just gets everywhere, and it really sticks to skin.  It's worse than sand!  It's some kind of supernatural substance similar to a black hole... no wait, that's not right.  That would suck things in.  Okay fine.  It's a supernatural substance similar to some other substance that gets freaking EVERYWHERE!  I ended up looking like a crazed Twilight vampire before it was over!  I felt like I should go out, run faster than the eye could follow out in the woods then jump out at unsuspecting people or deer to yell "HA!!!" Oh yeah, that's what I'd do as a vampire.  Alright, I'd be a geeky and weird sort of vampire, which is why it's so bad that I look like one!

So you should probably consider this post as a public service announcement.  You know I'm only interested in the welfare of the public... and stuff.  I'm am here for you, my dear readers and loyal subjects.  Here... for you! So all I ask is that you keep this little tip in mind. When working with glitter, please remain fully clothed... in something like a Hazmat suit.  You'll thank me!  Now I'm off to make a bottle of GOLD fairy dust! Wheeee!

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