Going Geisha

Hello again, dear readers and loyal subjects! I am finally back from Asia!  I apologize for seemingly disappearing while I was there but it turns out even the Queen can be exhausted by jet lag, site seeing and working on projects at an international convention all at the same time.  Who knew?!  Anyway, I am back home finally and happy to be here.  I'm still dealing with some jet lag from the reverse trip but I'm finally feeling up to sharing some of the things that happened while I was in China and Korea again!  I may have been exhausted but there were still plenty of funnies to go around!  So it's time to get back into the saddle as I make time to write again and let you know all about the weird things that continue to go on around me while I travelled the world!

This is a geisha.  Technically she is Japanese, but she is also apparently the Asian ideal for beauty... at least for the purposes of this particular story.

Tip of the day for any of you women... or men who wear make-up, I suppose... who travel from the West to the Far East.  Do NOT run out of make-up while you are there!  The Queen is a nice girl from the South in the US. (Think Scarlet O'Hara but blonde.  It's not because I look like Scarlet O'Hara, but frankly I just like the comparison.  It's my blog so this is how we do it, people.)  But back to my story!  You see, while I was in China I realized that I was running low on one of my must have items, my MAC powdered foundation.  Yes, I was on vacation and none of these people was ever going to see me again, but the Queen is a vain creature and there were pictures being taken! These were for prosperity!  It's a royal duty to look stunning!  It's in the rules or something.  So the fact that I was running low was an issue.  It turned out to be even MORE of an issue when I managed to drop the case it was in and most of the remaining pressed powder broke apart and I lost a lot of it.  This had become... a crisis!

This is the Queen.  She is an angel (apparently) but she is NOT a geisha.  She's a nice tan southern girl!

I managed to make it through the rest of my stay in China but once I got to Korea, I started looking for a MAC counter... which I happily located!  The first one I found was in the airport in Incheon-Seoul.  I asked for the product I wanted in the shade I use and was simply told that they didn't have it.  The next counter I found was in a department store in Busan.  It was larger so I figured I'd have better luck here. At least that was what I thought before I realized that there was a basic disconnect between what I said I wanted and what the pretty girl working at the counter wanted me to have.  It turns out they didn't have the exact product I used.  Instead they had something newer, which was fine.  The problem came when I told her the name of the shade I wanted.  Apparently that had changed too, so we were left with trying to come up with something new that worked.  This is pretty much how the rest of the exchange went.

MAC chick placing something terribly white on the side of my face for my approval:  This works?
Queen:  Ummm, no. I think that's a little too white.  We need darker.
MAC chick trying something with only slightly more pigment:  This works?
Queen:  Ummm, no. I think we need darker.
MAC chick trying again and becoming agitated now:  This works?
Queen looking plaintively at MPH (My Poor Husband):  Does that work?
MPH:  No.  We still need darker.

Now I'm going to break stride here to say that my skin tone is a healthy tan.  I spend a lot of time outside, but I use sunscreen and tan responsibly.  I'm not pasty pale but I'm not "Tanning Mom" either. Okay, I'm done with that part.  Now we go back to the poor Mac chick who has already decided I'm some kind of freak.

MAC chick finally finds a shade that matches my skin and looks rather appalled as she says: That looks natural!
Queen:  YES!  Finally!  That one is perfect!  I'll take it.
MAC chick stares strangely at me then goes to ring up my purchase...
Queen to MPH:  Something was just wrong about that, don't you think?  I'm just not that pale.
MPH:  They have a different idea about beauty over here, dear.  She was trying to MAKE you whiter.
Queen:  I'd have looked like someone painted me white in what she showed me first!
MPH:  YES!  To her, that was perfect!
Queen, pausing:  But I don't want to look like that.
MPH patting my hand:  I know, dear.  We got it fixed.  She's just not happy about it now... and she thinks you're weird.  She can't figure out why you would want to wear something that makes you look like you already look.
Queen: YES!  I have extended my weirdness to a whole new continent!  SCORE!!!
MPH: You're definitely weird.

So the moral of this story is as follows:  It's hard as hell to find someone who understands make up in Korea!  No wait, that wasn't it.  It was be sure to pack enough make up when you travel in case you drop it and lose some!  Hmmm, that doesn't seem right either.  Oh wait! I've got it!  It's that the Queen is always right, even if you think she should look like a geisha and she doesn't.  Yup, that's definitely it... you're welcome.