Friday, March 9, 2012

Facebook Has My Unicorns and Fairies (subtitled: He So Totally Wants To Be My Friend)

The Queen now has her own Facebook page!  It's Queen Of All Things Good, and you should run there and like it!... like, you know, now. Are you still here?  You shouldn't be.  You should be there.  But then, of course, you should come back here because here is good. Here rocks!  Here is da bomb!  Okay, sorry. I haven't used that expression in years but it just slipped out.  Sometimes the Queen's exuberance gets the best of her.  Deal with it.  You see, I actually need you to go like it because Facebook is an evil empire, and they're withholding some goodies from the Queen until she gets a certain number of likes.  They call it "access to insights about your activity," but we all know what that means.  Yup, you guessed it.  Unicorns!  Unicorns and Fairies! Facebook has 'em and the Queen wants 'em!  I'm even willing to share them with my loyal subjects and dear readers, so go Like the Queen and we'll work together to release the unicorns and fairies back into the wild where they belong!  Or at least I'll let them hang out at my place because I think that would be cool.

I have to admit it, though.  My foray into social networking has been an interesting experience.  I've always had a Facebook account, but usually I didn't open it except for once every few months.  I've never gotten hooked on anything like Farmville, and frankly it's always really confused me that my friends were trying to send me prize winning pigs or lumber for a new barn every time I turned on Facebook.  Let's be honest here.  If you offer me a prize winning pig for some reason, I'm going to start waiting for the mailman to come lumbering up the driveway carrying a squealing and squirming hog and that would delight me to no end!  Everyone should have a pig!  They're cute!  My friend even posted a picture of the cutest little porker I've ever seen on her Facebook today... which I know about because I'm suddenly socially connected again.  This has perks, people!  See?!

This is what I was missing on Facebook!  Who wouldn't want this little guy delivered?  A virtual version just isn't going to cut it!  But wait, what was I talking about again?  Oh yeah!  Social networking!  So I'm really kind of proud of myself here.  I've not only rejoined Facebook, but I've also learned to blog, learned to twit (not a tough skill for a lot of people I know, as I've said before), and I've created the Facebook page for the Queen!  And I've done all this with little help!  I know the Web Mistress of All Things Good is proud of me!  But there have been other things I've learned as well.  For instance, did you know that if you create a professional Facebook page, all you can do is have people "Like" you?  The whole friends thing doesn't apply.  Turns out that MPH (My Poor Husband) was NOT aware of that... so I educated him... right there on the page for everyone's enjoyment!

MPH: So it begins...

The Queen You love it.

MPH:  I can't figure out how to friend you...

The Queen:  You can't! MWAHAHAHAHAHAAA!  Actually you really can't. I set this page up as a professional page. That way it's technically separate from my personal page so I won't be overwhelmed by the mobs of fans the Queen has on my personal page since you can only have 5000 friends on FB and we both KNOW that mobs are many more than 5000, at least I'm certain that'll be the case soon... any minute now... maybe later today. So anywho! You can like me... which I know you dooooooo, but The Queen has no friends. She's above that. 

MPH:  Good.  I didn't want to be your friend anyway.

The Queen:  You so totally do.

MPH:  Okay, you got me.  I do.

Isn't he the cutest, people?  And he puts up with me... which scores him all sorts of extra credit!  Although he doesn't have twitter still and just doesn't get it.  Frankly, sometimes I don't either, but I'm easily amused so there I am.  It's @QueenOfATG if you're looking for me.  You know, if I'm feeling benevolent when I get to my required number of Likes in order to unlock the gates of greatness over at Facebook... I might just let him pet my unicorn.  But maybe not. The Queen does have her moods.

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