Monday, March 19, 2012

Manual Labor? Me?!

You know, my day started out as any first real day back at work after trying to take over Disney World could possibly start.  I will admit that the Disney take over was harder than I'd have expected.  Turns out those Princesses band together when a Queen shows up.  Shoving one off a float so I'd have more room to wave to my subjects apparently just got them all feeling testy.  Who'd have thought?  But back to what I was talking about... my day was going pretty well.  I'd had my espresso.  I'd had a large cupcake with pink icing and little Mickey Mouse confetti that had managed to come home with me.  (What?!  It's the breakfast of champions, people!)  My people at work were all well.  My meetings went smoothly, mostly because they'd been postponed but that still counts, and I was able to keep up even after being gone for a while.  With all that said, why oh why did I end up doing manual labor after my work day ended?!

Now, manual labor isn't one of those things I'm usually very good at.  The Queen has her skill set.  I shop exquisitely.  I accessorize with glorious abandon.  I can point out the flaws of any of a number of princesses with nary a backwards glance.  I even pose for paparazzi photos without breaking a sweat, but I will admit that there are other skills I simply don't possess.  Needless to say, manual labor is one of those.  I'm not entirely sure how I got sucked into the vicious and labor intensive cycle today.  Oh and cooking.  Cooking is another of those things and I thought I should throw it out there as long as I was confessing to these teensy tinsy shortcomings.  And budgeting... because let's face it.  Queen's don't budget.  I think I'm getting off topic now, though.  Not sure how that happened either.

Anywho!  So there I was at the end of my work day when my beautiful middle daughter, Kaffie, came into my office to announce "It's 5:09.  When will you be finished?"  The only appropriate answer (mostly since I had caught up with everything by that time) seemed to be "Is now good for you?"  And... it was.  She wanted to play so off we went to the back yard.  And that's where it happened.  It was the four letter word... the one that starts with W... you know... don't you?  Oh please, do I have to hold your hands for this?!  It was WORK!  There was work hiding in wait for me in the backyard!  There it was... stalking me!  I swear that's what happened!  I walked out the door and it attacked!  There was nothing to be done to stop it!  Even I, your Queen, couldn't get away!  So my daughter and I somehow ended up working in the yard, getting things done and generally giving myself  a blister on my hand.  And that, dear readers and loyal subjects is just WRONG!  I think I even broke a nail!  This was not how my day was supposed to go.

I have to admit that my daughter did come up with a stroke of genius.  She's my daughter and all, and I'm terribly biased, but even with that in mind, this was still good stuff!  You see, we have one older dog and a new puppy, both of whom spent the past week being cared for in our fenced in back yard.  You see where I'm going with this, right?  There was some significant clean up that needed to go on.  So there I was with one shovel and a hoe trying to clean up the yard so we can walk barefoot through it.  This was, needless to say, a less than Queenly task.  But since I was the one who brought the sweet and cute puppy home, as MPH would no doubt remind me, I figured I'd better get started on it.  I'd gotten about half the yard done when my daughter, her royal cuteness, looked up at me and said the words that still resound with their sheer rightness!  "Mom," she said, "I think a boy should be doing this."  Okay, I admit that I wasn't completely clear on her logic when she first said it.  I did, however, stop a moment to think about it.  Let's just get this out here now.  While I am definitely the Queen here, I still have a hard time coming up with anything that I think a guy can do that I can't.  Add to that the fact that I might have a wee bit of a stubborn streak whenever anyone tells me they think I can't do something, and you have a recipe for me being absolutely certain that I can not only do anything I want, but that I can do it better than anyone else!  I so totally rock that way!  But I did stop and ask her about it, and even I can't fault her logic.  She looked at me and said "This is yuck!"  And yes, I had to admit it sort of was.  So she followed that up with "And boys usually like to do the yuck things."  And that is exactly when I stopped doing the manual labor and put the shovel and hoe aside for MPH (My Poor Husband), because who was I to fault that logic.

On a side note, I did try to explain the whole thing to MPH who apparently has a faulty logic synapse or two in his noodle.  There was just no reasoning with the man.  I did however have a bunch of fliers made up that say "Kaffie for President!"  I figure her idea is definitely as good as any I've heard out of any other candidates of either party during this election year.  I think we're sure to get the royal votes!  Everyone be sure to register and vote often!  We're in it to win it!  Go team!


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