Monday, March 26, 2012

Tammie Gave Me Cooties

Tammie gave me cooties.  It's true!  I have figured this out all in my cold medication addled brain.  Tammie gave me internet cooties.  That is why I am sick after I spent the end of the week and weekend talking to her online and sending her get well wishes.  This is what I get for being a nice person.... cooties... of the icky kind... not that I'm sure there are cooties of any other kind but I feel like I should still clarify that here.

Yes, dear readers and loyal subjects, the Queen has a cold... a particularly nasty one, I assure you.  My head is all congested, and I'm tired of coughing and sneezing after less than 24 hours with it.  And no, it's not allergies.  This is a HUGE and UGLY virus of biblical proportions.  I'm certain that's the only sort of thing that could get through my royal immune system.  It's the equivalent of being jumped by about 10 big, burly thugs.  I swear!  At least that's what I'm telling MPH while I whine to him about not feeling good.  Fortunately I rarely get sick because I really do whine about it.  He's a good sport about it, though. And by good sport, I mean he takes one look at me in my sick costume, yells and backs towards the door while asking me if he can do anything in the tone of voice that says "Please say no!  Please say no!" so he can run screaming for the car.  Yeah, I admit it. I have a sick costume.  It's usually one of two things.  It's either a fleece footed pajama onesie sort of thing... the kind your young kids wear... that's baby blue with teddy bears reclining on clouds (Yeah, I actually own that.) or it's a pair of sweats, t-shirt, and sweatshirt over that.  Today it was the latter.  I was striking, I assure you.  But to my credit, when asked by a friend if I had a scrunchie in my hair too, I was able to answer honestly that I didn't.  I hadn't bothered to run a brush through my mop of hair after I got out of bed either, but at least I didn't have a scrunchie in it!  The Queen has SOME standards.  Yup!  My fever has to be a bit higher for the scrunchie to come out.

All of that said, I still managed to make it through work.  I'm not sure if anything I said or did today made sense.  Cold medications really sort of make me loopy.  Okay, they make me MORE loopy.  So I was loopy and paranoid all day that I might be acting loopy while actually BEING loopy... This was a vicious cycle, people.  Fortunately for all of you, and the coherence of this post, I am now cold medication free.  Unfortunately for me, I'm back to being congested, sounding like I'm talking in a tunnel, and wondering if straight whiskey is a good treatment for a cold.  At this point, it can't hurt!  Okay, I'm off. Where the heck are my drugs.  Get rest and drink OJ, people.  Apparently this thing is catching!

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